Qualities of a Deacon (1 Timothy 3:8-13)

Shane Millard
06/30/24 - Sun AM

As a part of the Lord’s church we have a very important responsibility - in 1 Timothy 3:14-15, Paul wrote these things to Timothy so that he would know how one ought to behave in the household of God, and he describes the church as having the purpose of being a pillar and buttress of the truth. Therefore, how one behaves has a direct impact on the purpose of the church. How we behave as men and women (1 Timothy 2:8-15), overseers (3:1-7), and deacons (3:8-13) must be governed by God’s word in order to accomplish this purpose for the truth.

What we see in these sections is that God has a structure to the church. God has a plan for the church. God has a way that we ought to behave - there are roles that we all have to play. What do those look like? And particularly, what does it look like for deacons?

The Organization of the church (1 Timothy 3:1, 8)

Notice that we have three leadership roles all working together here. We have the young evangelist Timothy doing his work of teaching and setting up leaders, that’s why he was given these particular qualities. Timothy is in Ephesus under a charge: 1 Timothy 1:3-7. One part of how he will accomplish this is by having leaders that will help in the work.

Elders are to shepherd and be examples to the flock (Acts 20:28-35). Deacons are to serve and allow the shepherds to do their work (Acts 6). Deacons are to take away responsibilities that are not connected to the work of the word and prayer, and allow these men to focus in these specific areas. The coordination allows the church to function properly.

However, notice that women are not to be leaders in the church. There is some disagreement and discussion about women deaconesses, which we can discuss at another time. But notice, as it relates to authority and teaching, women are not to do this over a man - 1 Timothy 2:11-15. These leaders are expected to be married men as well. However, God is not relegating women to the bench. They are expected to learn, teach others, serve, etc, it just must be with respect to the proper structure and organization.

The role of these men should be clear. As one man described it, elders lead ministry, deacons facilitate ministry, and the congregation does ministry (Deacons Pg 85, Quote within book)

The Qualities of the men (1 Timothy 3:8-10, 12)

These men will have a very important role and it’s important that we see what these men must be in order to appoint the right men to the positions. God has spoken on the character that is expected and required for this position. This is not open to suggestions or changes. This is a public role in the church that will have impact in the world as well.

First, notice that God is more concerned about the character of the man than about his abilities and gifts. We are not looking for someone that has good handy man skills, website and computer skills, or other areas of management. We first off need the right kind of person. If it’s simply about having work done, we could hire out for various projects. But these are to be leaders in the local church and so their character must reflect that.

Now, immediately, we must acknowledge that we are not expecting someone who is perfect. We need someone who is humble, repentant, and who can be an example to the flock. We need people that have experience the gospel and are willing to serve.

Dignified - this has with it the idea of worthy of respect of honor. This is a general description of the entire life. They carry themselves in a respectful way in all areas of life. The following descriptions help to elaborate on what this looks like.

Not double tongued - Deacons will be in hard areas of service. They are often times middle management and are interacting with the shepherds as well as saints - some of which may have problems and challenges. Deacons are on the front life of some of the challenges and suffering that happen in a church. It is important that their tongues are guarded from gossip and slander. Being double tongues telling one person one thing and another person something else. It can come from hypocritical pride and can be a sign of inordinate fear of man - that can destroy a church. They must resist flattery as well as gossip. They must have a healthy fear of God in order to resist the temptations to be men pleasers (Galatians 1:10)

Not addicted to much wine - drunkenness is a sin for all christians (Ephesians 5:18), but this is speaking to the ability of a person to be enslaved to their appetites or addictions. Some of the work that is being done might be with people who struggle with addictions or being surrounded with people who struggle in these particular areas.

Not greedy for dishonest gain - with control of speech, and appetites, they must control their money as well. Deacon work often times has financial applications and is easy opened to corruption - like the position of treasurer. This man can not obsess over money or cut moral corners at a price. These men must be free from the love of money.

Hold the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience - we might think that how knowledgeable a person is in the scripture is not relevant to the work they do. But not according to what Paul says. The role of a deacon is not a teaching role per se, no quality says they must be apt to teach. However, these must be people that have held the mystery (the gospel) in their hearts. They must know the truth, they must hold on to it, they must live consistently with it.

Tested and proven - This is a process that must take time. To hastily lay hands on someone can be disastrous for a church (1 Timothy 5:21-22). This will represent itself in various different ways because the specifics are not laid out. But tests regarding understanding of key doctrines, test of the lifestyle in the home, family, and work relationships, as well as evaluation in the church are all appropriate.

Faithful family life - this man must be a devoted husband, a one woman type of man. If he struggles with sexual relationships, this authority position can be a real danger and cause major damage to a local church. Further, the way that a man operates in his marriage and with his children is an example of how he will work in the church. The home is always the testing ground for those who lead in the local church. There must be leadership in the home, with gentleness, firmness, joy, and love. There must be proper beliefs, morale, diligence, and training. This man has to be a family man, if he is not, he is not qualified.

In this area we have some specific questions often presented - what does it mean to be husband of one wife and to have children?

Husband of one wife - I believe the most logical concept is that this is a scripturally married man. I do not believe this restricts a man who has been widowed and remarried, or a divorced person from serving because they do not have multiple wives. This seems to be a description that the man is married, and that he handles himself in marriage a certain way. There is room for disagreement on this and the church here must come to agreement on who serves.

Children - This obviously shows that the man must have children, and that he must handle his family in a certain way, but often times the question is how many? Can a man serve with one child? Must he have more than one to have “children”? Later in this book in 1 Timothy 5, Paul uses this word and it clearly includes one child as the children. For example, if a woman is a widow and has children who are to learn godliness (1 Timothy 5:4), would a single child be required to take care of his mother or is it only those women that had more than one child? The obvious answer is that it includes one, as well as the others. The same is true in (1 Timothy 5:9), could a woman be enrolled if she only had multiple children, but not if she only raised one child? The point is obvious, the plural includes the singular.

The Qualities of the wives (1 Timothy 3:11)

Now, there is discussion about wether these women are the wives of the deacons (and I believe it includes elders) or if these are deaconesses. That's not a topic we're going to dig into at this moment. Regardless, there are qualities required of these particular women as well.

These women are to be dignified, like the men in verse 8. They need to handle themselves in a respectful way and have a good reputation among others.

Not slanderers - these women do not be guilty of tearing others down and ruining their reputations. The tongue is a little fire than care spread quickly. The temptation in being a wife of a church leader is to become bitter, complain, and tear others down. They may be privy to certain problems in the church as well and be able to leverage that information against others. These women must then have a reputation regarding how they speak of others.

Sober-minded - this includes many things, but at a basic level it means they have control of their faculties. They are not regularly causing themselves to not think clearly through medicine or other substances. They must have a certain mental aptitude as well in order to function in their proper role.

Faithful in all things - these are women that will be ministering along side their husbands. They need to be trustworthy and reliable. They need to be known as people that can accomplish promptly and with a high quality. Their lives need to be modeled by and based on trust.

The Blessing for the men (1 Timothy 3:13)

The danger is that this can be a bit of a thankless job. It can feel like middle management and that’s always a hard place to be. These men are recognized and appreciated by God and they should be valued and appreciated by us as well.

As such, God makes a specific promise to these men, if they serve well they gain a good standing and great confidence. What does this include?

The good standing should be in the eyes of men, but it also likely includes the eyes of God. One of the most important ways that God revealed him is in the service of Jesus and he received a good standing from God because of his service. Because he did his job well, he was one that God highly exalted (Philippians 2:9). The role of a deacon is an important work that should be appreciated by everyone, including the person doing the work. Serve well. Do you work well. Realize your contributions are valuable.

Further, there is great confidence in the faith. This is a practical way that these men live out the gospel. Their “menial” tasks are contributing to the work of God and they can be confident that when they are serving well, God knows and that they will be rewarded as part of that.

What an important reminder to a section of workers in the kingdom that often work in the shadows, in very difficult areas, and whose work may never be fully seen or appreciated. The promises of God then inspire confidence and motivate to levels of excellence in the work that these men do, and they should do the same for all of us as well.

Conclusion

All of us then have a blessing to be part of the church of the living God and we have a responsibility to the truth. All of ought to behave in such a way that the work goes forward and is accomplished. If we look carefully, these qualifications are actually very normal. All of these are expected from every member - Ephesians 4:29, 5:18, 4:28; 5:5, 3:1-10, 5:22-33, 6:1-4, 6:19.

All of us have promises that come from God and a role to play, but all of this comes from a life that has really experienced the gospel and the blessings of God. When we understand what God has done for us, who we used to be and who we are now, we gladly offer ourselves in service to the church and one another as living sacrifices and examples of the servant heart that was present in Jesus as he gave himself for us.